Day 59: How to Number 2 in Morocco

Today begins our last week of class. We have Arabic monday to thursday morning with our final during class on thursday. In the afternoons we have Prof Green's class on Monday and Prof Sadiqi's class on Thursday, but are otherwise free to work on our two final papers. I walked three of the ways to school, had chicken tagine at home for lunch, and have begun studying for finals and working on my papers. Last night, I skyped Maddie for an hour before bed and watched sunday's episode of Game of Thrones.

I want to use today's post to talk about the potty. Moroccans take pride in their appearance and hold themselves to very high standards of personal hygiene. That being said, many of them smell absolutely terrible because custom dictates that you go to the hammam once a week. On the whole though, most Moroccans shower every day (everyone in my host family does) and try not to smell too bad. They also sweat a lot less than westerners do because they are acclimatized and have undergone generations of evolution to adjust to the temperature. That is why when I am in a t-shirt and shorts, I still see Moroccans wearing three or four layers without breaking a sweat. Most showers have a hose and moveable shower head, but the distinguishing feature is the lack of boundary between the shower and the rest of the bathroom. Unlike in the West, the drain for the shower is just on the floor and there is no tub or closet or glass doors or formal area you step into to shower. Sometimes, there is a curtain. It saves space, but the rest of the bathroom gets wet too. In Assilah, we had an issue because the drain was clogged when Meredith showered so water started coming out from under the door and spreading into the surrounding rooms.

In terms of excretions, bathrooms and practices vary. You have two types of toilets: Western and Non-western. The former is your standard issue Porcelain throne to which you'd bring a sudoku book or a novella and hang out for a half hour. The latter is also called a squat toilet and it's just a pretty looking hole in the ground. Squat toilets have a small hole about the circumference of a large water bottle and two foot pads to stand on. I tend to do the "one hand on the knee, one hand on the wall behind me" technique, but everyone's got their own style. To flush, there is normally a spigot and a bucket near the toilet, so you fill up the bucket and pour water around the toilet and down the hole. As a result, squat toilet restrooms tend to be much wetter. Urinals are not very popular and are rarely seen in public Moroccan restrooms. On the other hand, bidets are quite popular for reasons that I am about to discuss. In our main bathroom, there's a western toilet, and in the laundry room, there's a squat toilet. I'm comfortable using either so which one I use varies on my mood and availability.

Typical squat toilet with bucket/spigot combo. Also demonstrates typical level of cleanliness of bathrooms

For cleaning up after doing your business, Moroccans don't use toilet paper! As in much of the Middle East, they prefer what I call a "wet wash." This can come from one of four sources. 

1) The previously mentioned bucket and faucet is the default way of cleaning your crack in public restrooms. 

2) Small hose. Most private bathrooms, including the one in my house, have a small hose coming of the shower or out of the wall that is used only for washing your booty. 

3) Bidets. Only for wealthy Moroccans and hotels, a bidet combines the best of the West (sitting) and the best of the East (water shooting up your ass) into one device. 

4) Shower head. Before getting too handsy with your shower head, be sure to check that the bathroom has either toilet paper or one of the previous three methods to clean yourself. If not, that means that shower head you're about to grab has spent a lot of time washing your other cheeks too. 

Toilet paper is pretty widely available though, especially in restaurants, hotels, and homes that are less traditional; however, my house only offers the hose or the bucket so I have stolen a roll or two from ALIF. 

One of the strangest things of all though is that as a man, you can pee wherever you want! We've seen so many men just peeing on walls and on trees on the sidewalks in Fes, both inside and outside of the medina. Women would never do this, and as a foreigner, I haven't dared to try it, but it appears to be socially acceptable for Moroccan men to mark their territory as they please.